![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
winter-mod.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
winterknightsTitle: Make A Wish
Author/Artist:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
tayastrange
Pairing(s): Merin/Arthur
Prompt: #18
Word Count/Art Medium: 6,106
Rating: Mature
Contains (Highlight to view): *mildly dubious consent, face-fucking*
Disclaimer: Merlin characters are the property of Shine and BBC. No profit is being made, and no copyright infringement is intended.
Notes: This fic was created in a small collaboration withlao_paperman. Her beautiful artwork is in a separate post. Thank you, Lao~
Summary: After the dragon revealed that Arthur will have to marry and produce heirs in order to fulfill his destiny at some point in the future, Merlin sees all his dreams of being with the man he had been pining after for years destroyed. It is the night of the Winter Solstice when he remembers that a wish upon a falling star is supposed to come true at that time of the year. So Merlin climbs the highest of Camelot's towers to see if there's any truth to this rumor and asks the gods for one night with Arthur.
Read it on Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17081684
The night was biting cold, turning his breath into translucent clouds floating towards a brilliantly clear sky. The weather couldn’t have been more fitting for the longest darkness. Stars, bright and rich, were shimmering above him, their light seeming almost harsh and sharp.
Merlin let his gaze wander away from the unmoving display. It fell down to the courtyard, which had been filled with spectators only a few hours ago, but now lay practically deserted and bathed in moonlight far below the western tower. The silence had startled him when he had stepped outside, still expecting to find the solstice fire blazing in the middle of the yard while onlookers celebrated with song and dance. Now it was quiet. And Merlin welcomed it.
The official Yule-Celebrations had been in their final throes when he had sneaked off to get away from the heat and the noise of the remaining revellers. With lords and ladies deep into their cups most servants had already left, convinced their absence wouldn’t be noticed, and Merlin had been sick of foreign hands grabbing his arms - and sometimes his arse - demanding more wine to fill their reeking mouths. Though Arthur probably wasn’t drunk enough to be oblivious to his escape, Merlin was convinced the prince wouldn’t miss him. Lady Juliana and Lady Beth were making sure of that. He could still see them, glued to the prince’s side, trying to suck attention.
“Like leeches…”, he grumbled, wrapping his arms around his body.
The wind had picked up and he was already regretting that he left his new cloak in his chambers. The garment had been lying wrapped in paper and twine on Arthur’s table when he had brought him breakfast this morning. A heavy woolen cloak, the inside lined with fur, the wool dyed a rich cobalt blue; commissioned by the prince so that his manservant would finally have “something proper to wear and not embarrass him further with complaints about his icy bottom”. Arrogant and pompous as the first day they met Arthur had handed it to Merlin, pretending that the whole affair was nothing but an inconvenience brought upon him by Merlin’s incompetence.
Merlin smiled at the memory. No matter how hard Arthur tried, no matter how high he built the walls around his vulnerable core, Merlin could always see through him. Arthur might boast and joke as much as he liked, he still knew that the gift was meant kindly. He had known for a long time that his lord, his prince could be kind. Kinder than he maybe should be with a servant.
In certain moments Merlin let himself turn weak and bathe in these memories. The moments when Arthur cared. They struck a chord deep inside him that he could barely silence once it started swinging. He could hear it already, becoming stronger, louder, pushing his heart against his chest in a hurried rhythm that brought his blood to boil and let warmth flow over his frozen skin. In those moments he loved Arthur the most while simultaneously cursing him to the nether realm and back. Because they led him to believe that his prince could love him back. That there was a role for him in Arthur’s life that would be more than just a servant and different from a trusted friend. He had dreamed of it.
Dreams of trust. Dreams of devotion. Dreams of love and even passion.
But still, as strong as they had made him feel, they were just dreams and had to end sooner or later. Two months ago the dragon had set fire to his illusions, burning everything Merlin had dared to hope without breathing a single flame. Another part of the prophecy that seemed to be bound on destroying his life was revealed to him that night, setting into stone another part of Arthur’s future, in which Merlin would never be more than a mere pawn. A queen was foretold, strong-willed and wise, ruling by Arthur’s side and bearing children to ensure the future of his house.
Merlin knew that he had been stupid to wish for a future in which he would be at Arthur’s side, bound to him not only by prophecy but by their own will. He should have known that it could never be. Even without their combined destinies manipulating their paths it was delusional to believe the Crown Prince of Camelot could ever choose him.
Shaking his head at his own foolishness Merlin’s gaze rose to the sky again to observe the stars more intensely now. They were his reason to brave the coldness. It was an old tradition to wish upon a star on the day of the longest night. The people believed that it was a time when the old gods were closest to their realm, able to hear their pleas and in some cases generous enough to answer them.
Not even as a child Merlin had been convinced that wishes could actually come true. Why should the gods care for someone as small as him and his mother? How would they benefit from fulfilling something that was so very insignificant in their grant scheme? It was ludicrous to believe in such childish dreams.
But if it was true, if the gods could really hear him tonight and would be kind enough to grant him one wish, and one wish only for the entirety of his life, he would ask for Arthur’s love. Just one night of his prince’s devotion and desire only placed on Merlin and lived to the fullest before everything would be wiped from Arthur’s mind in the morning. This way he would finally know what it felt like to be loved by the man who he had sworn to protect with his own life. Every word and every touch would be turned into a memory, to be cherished by Merlin until the end.
Praying for the unbelievable to happen, Merlin closed his eyes when the first star fell.
Only a few servants were still running about to clean up after the honored guests when Merlin returned to the Great Hall. That meant that Arthur had been forced to leave without his servant to accompany him. Merlin could already hear His Royal Highness rambling about the most useless manservant he ever had.
At least he would be remembered by Arthur in some way.
He didn’t wait for a response after knocking to enter the royal chambers. After Merlin came into Arthur’s service he had been reprimanded for his lack of manners and seemingly absent sense of privacy constantly, but at some point Arthur must’ve just accepted it as one of his many flaws and gave up. Merlin found his prince standing in front of the fireplace, fiddling with the golden clasp that secured the red cloak on his shoulders. He didn’t look up when Merlin appeared at his side, instead choosing to ignore him. Rolling his eyes, Merlin batted his hands away.
“Let me help you with this, My Lord”, he said in hopes that using the title would soothe Arthur’s anger.
A gush of air was was pushed through Arthur’s teeth, signifying his annoyance.
“Of course, but only if it doesn’t inconvenience you in your obviously busy schedule, Merlin.”
The words were delivered with a familiar snotty arrogance, that used to aggravate Merlin in the past but had become an almost comforting part of Arthur’s behaviour by now. Still, they were not as precise and sharp as usual, the last syllable definitely a little slurred. He could smell a strong note of wine on the prince’s breath as well. It would be a pleasure to deal with his hungover royal arse in the morning.
His fingers had already moved on to Arthur’s belt, fumbling at the metal which looped through soft leather, when a prickling in his neck sent a shiver down Merlin’s spine. Through the quietness he could only hear the crackling sound of burning wood and Arthur’s breathing close to his face. He could feel the warm air ghosting over his forehead, stirring his hair, making him aware of how close they were. Since Merlin started to recognise his desire he had come to dread the minutes of the day when he had to help Arthur get dressed or undressed. The intimacy of the act had never occurred to him before and now he couldn’t escape it, his body betraying him ever so often when he would lift the fabric to find Arthur’s sun-kissed skin underneath. A nervous trembling was already making its way into his icy hands while his blood was rushing elsewhere. He needed to hurry and get out of here.
With a soft thud the belt fell to the stone floor, Merlin’s fingers unable to hold onto it.
“You seem even more inapt than usual…” Arthur mumbled, his gaze weighing heavy on Merlin.
“Maybe it’s just the wine addling your mind, My Lord.”
Arthur answered that with a low chuckle.
Merlin could feel the prince staring, following his movements with intense dedication. Usually Arthur just ignored him during this mundane task but today all his attention seemed to be drawn to his servant. The impression didn’t do anything to calm Merlin’s nerves. Avoiding the prince’s eyes he directed his own to the doublet, working quickly to get it off. He felt his heart beating faster now, his hands getting closer to touching Arthur’s skin again. When the lined garment finally came off, the warmth radiating off the prince’s body was undeniable. Suddenly hungry to see and feel again, if only for a moment, Merlin grabbed the hem of Arthur’s tunic, almost anxious to see it gone.
“By the gods, Merlin!”
Arthur’s shout cut through the silence like a blade, paralysing Merlin. Before he could ask, his hands, which he had maybe pressed a little too strongly into Arthur’s sides, were grabbed and almost squashed together between rough palms. Intense heat engulfed them, making Merlin aware how cold he still was.
“Your hands are like ice. Where have you been?” Arthur asked, sounding a little indignated.
All Merlin could do was stare at his pale fingers wrapped by Arthur’s, struggling to process the intimacy of the touch. He couldn’t stay like this.
“I...I just needed some fresh air”, he stammered, still refusing to look up.
“Fresh air…”
Arthur was not letting go.
“That’s what you left me for.”
The prince’s tone had turned petulant. It confused Merlin even further.
“Left you?” he repeated. “That sounds dramatic.”
“It is. You didn’t only neglect your duties. You also left me to the mercy of those two...two…”
“Leeches?” Merlin’s mouth volunteered without his mind’s involvement.
A small laugh escaped Arthur’s lips. Merlin could feel it on his forehead.
“Yes, leeches. You left me, so they could suck me dry.”
Arthur’s voice had become quieter, as if his attention was not on the conversation. His face had moved closer, his nose almost touching Merlin’s. But still Merlin wouldn’t catch the prince’s gaze. Arthur was drunk and probably angry. Maybe this was his new way of torturing his useless manservant. Finding a new resolve, Merlin tried to free his hands from Arthur’s. But instead of letting go, Arthur’s grip tightened, bringing their hands together between them.
“I was convinced you enjoyed their attention”, Merlin tried to jest in order to loosen the atmosphere.
But his voice was too tight, the words almost getting stuck in his throat which was suddenly occupied by his rapidly beating heart.
“Don’t be ridiculous, Merlin”, Arthur whispered and suddenly a hand was in his neck, fingers tangling in his hair and all he could do was to follow their lead and let his head be guided forward, until his lips met Arthur’s.
Merlin’s body grew stiff, his eyes wide with disbelief. Arthur’s lips were warm and wet, as if he had just licked them before pressing them to Merlin’s mouth. Unmoving and insistent Arthur seemed to hope for a reaction. And Merlin wanted nothing more than to show him how much he had longed for this. To open his mouth and let Arthur’s touch rob him of every coherent thought, until he would melt into his embrace, his mind wrapped in pure bliss. But he could still smell the sharp odour of wine on Arthur’s breath and Merlin refused to be the substitute for whatever the prince hadn’t received tonight. He didn’t want to take something from this man that he would later regret and deny.
Just when Arthur was about to draw away again, his eyes opening slightly, searching for Merlin’s gaze, the pressure of his lips almost lost, a thought occurred to him. What if it was not the wine that fueled Arthur’s desire? What if it was an enchantment? Made by the gods themselves?
Before he fully lost contact with the prince’s lips, Merlin finally wrangled his hands from Arthur’s loosening grip and slipped them into his neck to bring them back together. The movement was so sudden that Merlin almost lost his balance, his chest knocking into Arthur’s, who automatically brought his hands up to Merlin’s sides to steady him. He could feel that Arthur was slightly confused, but when those hands didn’t fall away and Arthur’s mouth opened to Merlin’s prying tongue, he let his needs freely wash over him, unwilling to let go now that he was gifted the only thing he had never dared to speak of.
Arthur’s mouth was hot. Warm, wet breath laced with alcohol greeted Merlin when his tongue pushed inside to taste and feel. It should have been disgusting, but Merlin could only shiver as Arthur’s tongue slid against his. Simultaneously, the prince’s hands had wandered under his jacket to reach the hem of his tunic. Those fingers dancing lightly over the sensitive skin on his hips shot a jolt through Merlin’s spine, each and every one of his hairs standing up. His hips pushed forward, grinding into Arthur’s almost on instinct and when he felt the very prominent outline of an erect cock in the woolen trousers, Merlin couldn’t suppress a pleased moan any longer. The grinding was returned while their breathless kiss commenced until Arthur’s hands left Merlin’s hips to grab him by the collar and break their connection. Merlin scrambled slightly and whimpered a little, to his own embarrassment, because he didn’t want to let go.
“Merlin”, Arthur said sternly to catch his attention.
When Merlin looked at him his gaze was intense, his light blue eyes almost piercing Merlin’s.
“You’re wearing far too much clothing.”
Merlin blinked, his mind, addled by desire, needing far too long to catch onto Arthur’s meaning. When he did, a wide, goofy smile appeared on his lips.
“You too, My Lord”, he replied teasingly.
“Then let’s stop wasting time.”
The words fell almost like a growl from Arthur’s mouth. Before he could react, Merlin’s jacket was grabbed and pushed over his shoulders impatiently until it fell off his arms. The breath caught in his lungs. He wanted to speak, to agree, but his tongue and lips wouldn’t cooperate, every thought he had somehow getting lost the moment Arthur’s fingers grabbed the hem of his tunic and lifted it with a swift and trained motion over his head. Despite the warmth goosebumps were forming on his skin, his heart hammering painfully now. Fear and excitement swirled into one emotion inside his chest. Fueled by the hunger to feel Arthur’s skin, Merlin divested him of his top just as quickly, finally finishing what he had been denied mere minutes ago.
When they were facing each other again, already breathing heavily without any actual bodily exertion having taken place, Merlin was only granted a short moment to appreciate Arthur’s toned torso and well muscled arms before the prince wound an arm around his waist, bringing their chests together. The sudden contact of heated skin sent a rush of blood into Merlin’s nether regions, a new peak of arousal making him forget any reservations he still might have had at this point. Pushing himself off the ground his long legs quickly circled Arthur’s waist, his bottom supported by Arthur’s hands. He could feel fingers pressing into the soft rounds of his arse, kneading it like dough. It had Merlin moan in unabashed arousal, the sound stifled by Arthur’s mouth, which had trapped his own in another passionate kiss.
They were moving now. Arthur walking carefully around the table while still carrying him. Only a few steps and Merlin felt Arthur bent forward until his back hit the velvet sheets covering the royal bed. He could feel his heart skipping a beat when the thought began to settle in his mind. They were in Arthur’s bed, the prince on top of him, kissing him, grinding into him. It seemed like Arthur wanted to eat him up and swallow him whole, both of them panting in between kisses since there was never enough time to breathe. Merlin’s head was spinning from the deprivation of air as well as blood. But he didn’t mind at all. Never would he mind going mad like this.
Somehow Arthur was able to untangle himself from Merlin’s limps, which were holding him tight like an octopus refusing to release its prey. But at some point he understood that the space was needed in order to get rid of the remaining clothes which still stood between him and what he desired. When Arthur ripped his boots off the intensity of his gaze pinned Merlin into place. Unable to coordinate his digits he let his prince undo the lacing on his trousers and tug them down the long stretch of his legs until they were finally on the floor, immediately forgotten. Arthur’s garments were gone just as quickly. And as he stood there, golden, regal and strong in the fire light, Merlin was dumbstruck by the view. There was an aggression in Arthur’s piercing eyes, an overwhelming sense of hunger growing while they were roaming Merlin’s naked body, as if the last bit of sanity was leaving him as well.
The view fully convinced Merlin that his wish had been granted. Only an enchantment woven by the gods themselves could be potent enough to invade the strong willed and clear headed Prince of Camelot to the point where he would forget everything only to indulge his lust. Another sting to Merlin’s heart, another thought weighing on his conscience, conflicting emotions battling the joy he felt about finally having Arthur’s love. He should feel bad for bewitching his prince. He should call upon his magic to put an end to this. He shouldn’t use anyone like this.
Unfortunately this train of thought found an abrupt ending when Arthur suddenly crawled in between his legs and swallowed his weeping cock to the root.
“By Albion!”, Merlin shouted while throwing his head back.
It almost hurt when he hit the pillows, but the sensation of Arthur’s hot mouth engulfing his sensitive flesh numbed him for anything else. Scrambling for leverage on the sheets Merlin’s back arched up, automatically pushing his hips towards Arthur’s face. The prince didn’t seem to appreciate being nearly gagged by his erection. Two hands grabbed Merlin hard, pressing him back into the mattress. He struggled but only achieved losing that heavenly mouth sucking his cock.
“Arthur, please!”
Merlin was finally able to detach his fingers from the red fabric covering Arthur’s bed. He wanted to grab his head, push it back down where it belonged. But his prince had other plans. Suddenly Arthur was above him, covering his body with his own, letting Merlin feel the heat radiating off his skin. His eyes were shimmering, the firelight dancing in them while a smug smile graced those pink lips.
“What Merlin? What do you want?”, he teased, moving his hips slowly now, rubbing their cocks together.
The sensation of the engorged flesh moving against his own, silky skin and slick precome easing the way, was completely overwhelming, leaving Merlin to moan and mewl, unable to form clear words. His hips rose once again from the sheets, increasing the friction gloriously. Even his golden prince was forced to close his eyes and let a rough moan escape his throat. The sound ripped Merlin from his aroused haze. This was Arthur above him, he realised. The man he had desired for so long was naked in his arms and he was about to pass out from some humping and rubbing. If this was his only night with Arthur he couldn’t let himself be satisfied by that. He wouldn’t waste his wish by only feeling and not tasting.
Wrapping his trembling hand around Arthur’s cock Merlin stroked him sensually, revelling in the feeling of this vulnerable part of Arthur in his palm. The prince’s control slipped visibly upon Merlin’s touch and the moment a deeper sound fell from his lips Merlin saw his chance to reverse their positions. Both arms wound tightly around Arthur’s torso he flipped their bodies on the mattress and suddenly Arthur found himself on his back, staring wide eyed at Merlin who was grinning triumphantly above him.
“Merlin, what’re you doing?”
“You didn’t think I was just gonna lie there, did you?”
Without giving the royal prat a chance to reply Merlin slipped down, littering Arthur’s toned chest and belly with kisses on his way. Though he felt like he could spent hours just exploring each and every crevice on this body, licking the salt from every stretch of skin, Merlin’s patience was wearing thin. He was a man on a mission and his mission waited between Arthur's legs in the form of a beautifully erect cock.
And how beautiful it was. Hard and hot and red between Merlin’s fingers, precome running down from the exposed tip that was glistening like a polished gem in the firelight. He felt his mouth water upon the view. The first lick felt incredible. New and unfamiliar was the taste of his prince on Merlin’s tongue, bitter and salty just as himself, but also different. Craving more he closed his lips around the tip to suck it deeper into his mouth, assaulting the weeping slit immediately with his tongue. Arthur shouted his name, his hips starting to tremble under Merlin’s head. Merlin could feel him struggle not to thrust up into the heat of his mouth and though he wanted to take his time with Arthur, he decided to have mercy on him for now. They still had the whole night.
Grabbing Arthur’s hips with both hands he pushed them forcefully onto the mattress and held them their while his mouth started its decent down Arthur’s prick. The hard flesh was difficult to swallow whole. Arthur’s prick was not especially long but wide, stretching Merlin’s lips well. But he enjoyed the feeling. Flattening his tongue against the underside of Arthur’s cock he sucked hungrily, coating it with copious amounts of saliva before he began to bob his head.
Arthur’s hands found their way into Merlin’s hair. He could hear sounds of pleasure being ripped from his throat, rough groans of uncontrollable arousal, surprisedly high notes of overwhelming lust. They caressed Merlin’s ears in the sweetest way possible, making his blood boil and rush towards his groin. His feast on Arthur’s cock became messier. He wanted more. More of these noises, more of this taste, more of Arthur’s flesh. Without being aware of it Merlin’s hips had started to grind into the sheets, driving his achingly hard erection down into the mattress. It felt too good to stop now. The prince’s struggles seemed to increase, trying to buck up uncontrollably and Merlin decided to let him. Loosening his grip on Arthur’s hips he let is head be held in place by his hands and relaxed his jaw, allowing for his face to be fucked in earnest. After the first few erratic attempts Arthur found a satisfying rhythm which lured Merlin back into a almost drunken haze in which only the cock in his mouth and the movement of his own hips existed.
Saliva and precome. Sweat and heat. Moans and whimpers. Pushing and pulling. Rubbing and stroking. This was all Merlin’s world had boiled down to and the whirlwind of sensations seemed to go on for an eternity, pulling him deeper and deeper inside, until he almost forgot that everything must end.
He was reminded of it when Arthur’s rhythm faltered while Merlin’s name echoed now continuously throughout the room. Fingers tugged roughly on his hair. It was painful but good. He could feel himself reaching the edge of his own climax. It wouldn’t need much now, only a little push.
When Arthur screamed his name towards the canopy and his come spread bitter and searing on Merlin’s tongue his orgasm hit him with force of a battering ram. Arthur’s cock slipped from his mouth and he came up for air like a drowning man. Panting harshly he rode out the waves of pleasure while he felt the prince’s body still writhe beneath him. And then Arthur was there, his presence overwhelmingly strong, cradling Merlin’s face and kissing his taste off Merlin’s lips.
“You are amazing”, Arthur whispered in between kisses. “Simply mad.”
Merlin, devoid of words, could only smile like a lunatic.
“What are you doing?”
Merlin froze in the middle of the room. The position was awkward, his foot barely touching the ground, creating some difficulty for him to not fall on his arse. A prickling in his neck told him that Arthur was watching him.
“Merlin, I’m talking to you. Have you gone deaf?”
Arthur’s voice sounded rough and sleep addled. The syllables seemed to stick to the roof of his mouth, his tongue not cooperating in releasing them properly. Apart from his lust driven moans this sleepy morning voice was probably the most wonderful sound Arthur’s mouth had ever created in Merlin’s presence. And how much he would give to not have heard it. To have Arthur not awake but in deep slumber so he could slip out of the room undiscovered and pretend much more easily that the events of last night had never taken place.
It had not been his intention to still be in the royal chambers at dawn. He had planned to leave as soon as Arthur had fallen asleep. But the gods were cruel in their ways of fulfilling his wish apparently and had bestowed the prince with seemingly insatiable lust and unbreakable stamina. After their third round he must have passed out right on top of Arthur, because that is where he woke up not even half an hour ago. With the feeling of warm skin under his cheek and Arthur’s beating heart beneath his hand the memories had come crashing back, setting his face aflame and bringing panic to his mind. Quiet like a mouse he had crawled from the bed to collect his clothes, already losing the wonderful warmth of Arthur’s embrace. But if he wanted to avoid uncomfortable questions he needed to get out and so, boots in hand, he had been on his way to the door when the question reached his ears.
Merlin was completely aware how suspicious he must look, but since Arthur had no idea what they did last night, it would be easy to make up any excuse. He could just go back to playing the idiot and Arthur would buy it in a heartbeat.
Turning around gracelessly, he painted an apologetic smile on his face.
“I’m truly sorry that I disturbed your slumber, Sire. It was not my intention. See, I even took my boots off to be more quiet.”
He gesticulated to the shoes dangling from his left hand.
“And what is it, that you wanted to do so quietly?” Arthur asked.
The prince was lying on his side, his body bare from the waist up, his head propped up on one hand. Even after such a night he was still annoyingly handsome. It took all of Merlin’s willpower to drag his eyes away from the exposed skin. He shrugged as nonchalantly as possible while his mind was racing to find a good excuse for coming into the prince’s chambers only to sneak out again.
“I just...uhm...wanted to see if you were already up…”
“Oh really?”
“Yes, then I would’ve gotten breakfast and maybe Gaius’ hangover remedy…”
Even while he was saying it Merlin was aware how unconvincing he must sound. Arthur appeared to be of the same opinion since one of his eyebrows had risen in a sceptical manner.
“Hangover remedy….I see...and you’re sure that you didn’t try to sneak away like a thief because you want to avoid me?”
Merlin blinked.
“What? Why would I want to avoid you?”
He could feel his breath speeding up. Arthur could not know. He had been very clear with his wish. But maybe there was something Arthur thought he ought to be angry about, like Merlin’s disappearance from the feast. It would make sense.
“Look, Arthur, I’m sorry that I walked away from the feast last night and left you to the mercy of those two ladies. I just needed some fresh air and I didn’t think you would notice-”
“What by the gods are you rambling about? I don’t care that you ran from the feast. I want to know why you’re trying to sneak out of my chambers like you committed a crime. Are you so horrified by what we did last night?”
Arthur sat up and turned to Merlin. His legs dangled over the side of the bed while the middle of his body was thankfully still covered by the blankets. The gods knew Merlin wouldn’t have been able to concentrate if this part of Arthur was revealed to him now. His newly rising panic was already taking a toll on his mind's capacities. Swallowing heavily, he struggled to keep a confused smile on his face.
“W-what do you mean ‘what we did last night’? We didn’t do anything”, he stammered slightly while his head reeled to find an explanation for whatever Arthur thought had happened. “But you were quite drunk, really, I can’t remember another time where you’ve been so deep into your cups. You must’ve had some very vivid dreams.”
The excuse was weak and Merlin knew it. But what else was he supposed to say? He needed to give Arthur a way out. If the enchantment had failed to wipe his memories completely, it was his duty to provide an escape for his prince.
“Dreams...I see…”
The words sounded almost sad.
Merlin heard Arthur’s bare feet touch the ground and the rustling of fabric being dragged over stone. In a desperate attempt to avoid Arthur’s gaze Merlin held his own eyes glued to the floor, his heart racing painfully behind his ribs. After a few second of silence Arthur’s toes appeared in his field of vision. The rest of the prince’s feet was covered by the bedsheets. Then a hand cupped his jaw delicately.
“So you say it was the wine making me imagine my manservant’s lips sucking me off like his life depended on it before he climbed on top of me to ride me until I screamed?”
Blood shot up his neck. Merlin could feel it rushing into his ears and cheeks, painting them a glowing pink, while Arthur recounted their love making in an almost dirty fashion. But it was the truth. They had fucked and Merlin had feasted on Arthur body like a starving man and presented himself like a willing whore. He had taken full advantage of the situation. And now he had to realise that the man he loved and had sworn to protect remembered every last bit of his abominable behaviour.
“I’m sorry. This was not supposed to happen… I...I didn’t even believe it would work…”
Tears prickled in his eyes, but Merlin refused to let them fall.
“You weren’t supposed to remember”, he whispered, but of course it was no excuse.
“What do you mean ‘not supposed to remember’?” Arthur replied with a hint of annoyance and agitation.
“My wish. My Yule-wish. It was stupid, I didn’t believe in it. Why should the gods grant a wish upon a star? But they did and now they're punishing me for my selfishness.”
Finally finding the resolve to look up he was greeted with an expression of pure confusion on Arthur’s face. There was no anger yet, but it would emerge as soon as Merlin confessed the whole extent of his crime. The first tears spilled from his eyes and the boots dropped from his hand.
“I’m so sorry, Arthur. I’ve wanted you for so long but I knew it could never be. So I waited for a shooting star and wished for your desire to fall on me for one night. I only wanted one night to treasure forever while you would forget and go on with your life and build your kingdom and find your...queen.”
Arthur’s hand drew away from his face. He took a step backwards only to stare at Merlin with round eyes of disbelief. Though Merlin knew he didn’t deserve Arthur’s touch its loss still stung.
“Only to make sure I’m getting this right; you left the feast to wait for a shooting star to wish for me to get enchanted so I would fuck your brains out and then you wanted me to forget about it so I’d have no trouble with finding my comely wife and you could wank to the memories of this night all by yourself?”
The dry note in which the question was delivered pulled Merlin partially from his misery and had him take a closer look at Arthur face. Until now he had expected to see anger and confusion, maybe even pain and building rage. But the way Arthur phrased his abominable deed was too casual. There was a strange twinkling in his eyes which betrayed the tightness of his jaw.
“Y-yes?”, Merlin stammered, unable to think straight.
There was definitely annoyance in Arthur’s features. His light blue eyes rolled upwards, while his chest heaved with an exasperated sigh.
“Typical. Instead of keeping it simple and just leaving the feast with me to let me ravish you in my chambers after I’ve given you numerous hints throughout the year as to how much I wanted to do just that, you rather freeze your little bottom off for something that makes you even more miserable. Why am I not surprised?”
The breath caught in his throat when Arthur’s words hit him like a hauberk. What he heard made no sense. His prince had wanted him for a year and he hadn’t recognised it? Was he truly that thick to not see Arthur’s desires? Did that mean…
“You’ve...you’ve wanted me all along?”, he croaked.
Arthur smirked, amusement spreading over his face.
“Yes, Merlin. Nice of you to notice.”
Completely dumbfounded, Merlin could only stare while Arthur stepped closer again and slipped a hand into his neck to draw him in. The kiss was salty at first, but when it became deeper the last of Merlin’s tears were washed away and he could finally taste the sweetness of Arthur’s mouth and this time no bad conscience was embittering the experience. His arms snaked around broad shoulders and his fingers dug greedily into warm skin. Arthur’s hands found their way to the small of Merlin’s back and he felt himself being pressed against his body. The loss of the bedsheet did not bother his prince, apparently.
“So my wish was never granted”, Merlin mumbled against Arthur’s cheek when they finally broke the kiss to gain some air.
“Would you rather it was?”
Bringing a little space between them Merlin looked into Arthur’s earnest face. He seemed worried.
“No. I prefer being a thick idiot who didn’t see the signs.”
Relief seeped into the prince’s features. They both started to grin.
“That’s good then. But really, Merlin, wishing upon a star….what are you? Five?”
Merlin’s grin turned to a snort and then, when he finally realised the ridiculousness of his antics, into wheezing laughter. Arthur’s voice joined in without hesitation, echoing with amusement and joy in Merlin’s ears.
Destiny could go fuck somebody else for a change, Merlin thought. Arthur was doing a much better job, anyway.
Author/Artist:
tayastrangePairing(s): Merin/Arthur
Prompt: #18
Word Count/Art Medium: 6,106
Rating: Mature
Contains (Highlight to view): *mildly dubious consent, face-fucking*
Disclaimer: Merlin characters are the property of Shine and BBC. No profit is being made, and no copyright infringement is intended.
Notes: This fic was created in a small collaboration with
lao_paperman. Her beautiful artwork is in a separate post. Thank you, Lao~Summary: After the dragon revealed that Arthur will have to marry and produce heirs in order to fulfill his destiny at some point in the future, Merlin sees all his dreams of being with the man he had been pining after for years destroyed. It is the night of the Winter Solstice when he remembers that a wish upon a falling star is supposed to come true at that time of the year. So Merlin climbs the highest of Camelot's towers to see if there's any truth to this rumor and asks the gods for one night with Arthur.
Read it on Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17081684
The night was biting cold, turning his breath into translucent clouds floating towards a brilliantly clear sky. The weather couldn’t have been more fitting for the longest darkness. Stars, bright and rich, were shimmering above him, their light seeming almost harsh and sharp.
Merlin let his gaze wander away from the unmoving display. It fell down to the courtyard, which had been filled with spectators only a few hours ago, but now lay practically deserted and bathed in moonlight far below the western tower. The silence had startled him when he had stepped outside, still expecting to find the solstice fire blazing in the middle of the yard while onlookers celebrated with song and dance. Now it was quiet. And Merlin welcomed it.
The official Yule-Celebrations had been in their final throes when he had sneaked off to get away from the heat and the noise of the remaining revellers. With lords and ladies deep into their cups most servants had already left, convinced their absence wouldn’t be noticed, and Merlin had been sick of foreign hands grabbing his arms - and sometimes his arse - demanding more wine to fill their reeking mouths. Though Arthur probably wasn’t drunk enough to be oblivious to his escape, Merlin was convinced the prince wouldn’t miss him. Lady Juliana and Lady Beth were making sure of that. He could still see them, glued to the prince’s side, trying to suck attention.
“Like leeches…”, he grumbled, wrapping his arms around his body.
The wind had picked up and he was already regretting that he left his new cloak in his chambers. The garment had been lying wrapped in paper and twine on Arthur’s table when he had brought him breakfast this morning. A heavy woolen cloak, the inside lined with fur, the wool dyed a rich cobalt blue; commissioned by the prince so that his manservant would finally have “something proper to wear and not embarrass him further with complaints about his icy bottom”. Arrogant and pompous as the first day they met Arthur had handed it to Merlin, pretending that the whole affair was nothing but an inconvenience brought upon him by Merlin’s incompetence.
Merlin smiled at the memory. No matter how hard Arthur tried, no matter how high he built the walls around his vulnerable core, Merlin could always see through him. Arthur might boast and joke as much as he liked, he still knew that the gift was meant kindly. He had known for a long time that his lord, his prince could be kind. Kinder than he maybe should be with a servant.
In certain moments Merlin let himself turn weak and bathe in these memories. The moments when Arthur cared. They struck a chord deep inside him that he could barely silence once it started swinging. He could hear it already, becoming stronger, louder, pushing his heart against his chest in a hurried rhythm that brought his blood to boil and let warmth flow over his frozen skin. In those moments he loved Arthur the most while simultaneously cursing him to the nether realm and back. Because they led him to believe that his prince could love him back. That there was a role for him in Arthur’s life that would be more than just a servant and different from a trusted friend. He had dreamed of it.
Dreams of trust. Dreams of devotion. Dreams of love and even passion.
But still, as strong as they had made him feel, they were just dreams and had to end sooner or later. Two months ago the dragon had set fire to his illusions, burning everything Merlin had dared to hope without breathing a single flame. Another part of the prophecy that seemed to be bound on destroying his life was revealed to him that night, setting into stone another part of Arthur’s future, in which Merlin would never be more than a mere pawn. A queen was foretold, strong-willed and wise, ruling by Arthur’s side and bearing children to ensure the future of his house.
Merlin knew that he had been stupid to wish for a future in which he would be at Arthur’s side, bound to him not only by prophecy but by their own will. He should have known that it could never be. Even without their combined destinies manipulating their paths it was delusional to believe the Crown Prince of Camelot could ever choose him.
Shaking his head at his own foolishness Merlin’s gaze rose to the sky again to observe the stars more intensely now. They were his reason to brave the coldness. It was an old tradition to wish upon a star on the day of the longest night. The people believed that it was a time when the old gods were closest to their realm, able to hear their pleas and in some cases generous enough to answer them.
Not even as a child Merlin had been convinced that wishes could actually come true. Why should the gods care for someone as small as him and his mother? How would they benefit from fulfilling something that was so very insignificant in their grant scheme? It was ludicrous to believe in such childish dreams.
But if it was true, if the gods could really hear him tonight and would be kind enough to grant him one wish, and one wish only for the entirety of his life, he would ask for Arthur’s love. Just one night of his prince’s devotion and desire only placed on Merlin and lived to the fullest before everything would be wiped from Arthur’s mind in the morning. This way he would finally know what it felt like to be loved by the man who he had sworn to protect with his own life. Every word and every touch would be turned into a memory, to be cherished by Merlin until the end.
Praying for the unbelievable to happen, Merlin closed his eyes when the first star fell.
Only a few servants were still running about to clean up after the honored guests when Merlin returned to the Great Hall. That meant that Arthur had been forced to leave without his servant to accompany him. Merlin could already hear His Royal Highness rambling about the most useless manservant he ever had.
At least he would be remembered by Arthur in some way.
He didn’t wait for a response after knocking to enter the royal chambers. After Merlin came into Arthur’s service he had been reprimanded for his lack of manners and seemingly absent sense of privacy constantly, but at some point Arthur must’ve just accepted it as one of his many flaws and gave up. Merlin found his prince standing in front of the fireplace, fiddling with the golden clasp that secured the red cloak on his shoulders. He didn’t look up when Merlin appeared at his side, instead choosing to ignore him. Rolling his eyes, Merlin batted his hands away.
“Let me help you with this, My Lord”, he said in hopes that using the title would soothe Arthur’s anger.
A gush of air was was pushed through Arthur’s teeth, signifying his annoyance.
“Of course, but only if it doesn’t inconvenience you in your obviously busy schedule, Merlin.”
The words were delivered with a familiar snotty arrogance, that used to aggravate Merlin in the past but had become an almost comforting part of Arthur’s behaviour by now. Still, they were not as precise and sharp as usual, the last syllable definitely a little slurred. He could smell a strong note of wine on the prince’s breath as well. It would be a pleasure to deal with his hungover royal arse in the morning.
His fingers had already moved on to Arthur’s belt, fumbling at the metal which looped through soft leather, when a prickling in his neck sent a shiver down Merlin’s spine. Through the quietness he could only hear the crackling sound of burning wood and Arthur’s breathing close to his face. He could feel the warm air ghosting over his forehead, stirring his hair, making him aware of how close they were. Since Merlin started to recognise his desire he had come to dread the minutes of the day when he had to help Arthur get dressed or undressed. The intimacy of the act had never occurred to him before and now he couldn’t escape it, his body betraying him ever so often when he would lift the fabric to find Arthur’s sun-kissed skin underneath. A nervous trembling was already making its way into his icy hands while his blood was rushing elsewhere. He needed to hurry and get out of here.
With a soft thud the belt fell to the stone floor, Merlin’s fingers unable to hold onto it.
“You seem even more inapt than usual…” Arthur mumbled, his gaze weighing heavy on Merlin.
“Maybe it’s just the wine addling your mind, My Lord.”
Arthur answered that with a low chuckle.
Merlin could feel the prince staring, following his movements with intense dedication. Usually Arthur just ignored him during this mundane task but today all his attention seemed to be drawn to his servant. The impression didn’t do anything to calm Merlin’s nerves. Avoiding the prince’s eyes he directed his own to the doublet, working quickly to get it off. He felt his heart beating faster now, his hands getting closer to touching Arthur’s skin again. When the lined garment finally came off, the warmth radiating off the prince’s body was undeniable. Suddenly hungry to see and feel again, if only for a moment, Merlin grabbed the hem of Arthur’s tunic, almost anxious to see it gone.
“By the gods, Merlin!”
Arthur’s shout cut through the silence like a blade, paralysing Merlin. Before he could ask, his hands, which he had maybe pressed a little too strongly into Arthur’s sides, were grabbed and almost squashed together between rough palms. Intense heat engulfed them, making Merlin aware how cold he still was.
“Your hands are like ice. Where have you been?” Arthur asked, sounding a little indignated.
All Merlin could do was stare at his pale fingers wrapped by Arthur’s, struggling to process the intimacy of the touch. He couldn’t stay like this.
“I...I just needed some fresh air”, he stammered, still refusing to look up.
“Fresh air…”
Arthur was not letting go.
“That’s what you left me for.”
The prince’s tone had turned petulant. It confused Merlin even further.
“Left you?” he repeated. “That sounds dramatic.”
“It is. You didn’t only neglect your duties. You also left me to the mercy of those two...two…”
“Leeches?” Merlin’s mouth volunteered without his mind’s involvement.
A small laugh escaped Arthur’s lips. Merlin could feel it on his forehead.
“Yes, leeches. You left me, so they could suck me dry.”
Arthur’s voice had become quieter, as if his attention was not on the conversation. His face had moved closer, his nose almost touching Merlin’s. But still Merlin wouldn’t catch the prince’s gaze. Arthur was drunk and probably angry. Maybe this was his new way of torturing his useless manservant. Finding a new resolve, Merlin tried to free his hands from Arthur’s. But instead of letting go, Arthur’s grip tightened, bringing their hands together between them.
“I was convinced you enjoyed their attention”, Merlin tried to jest in order to loosen the atmosphere.
But his voice was too tight, the words almost getting stuck in his throat which was suddenly occupied by his rapidly beating heart.
“Don’t be ridiculous, Merlin”, Arthur whispered and suddenly a hand was in his neck, fingers tangling in his hair and all he could do was to follow their lead and let his head be guided forward, until his lips met Arthur’s.
Merlin’s body grew stiff, his eyes wide with disbelief. Arthur’s lips were warm and wet, as if he had just licked them before pressing them to Merlin’s mouth. Unmoving and insistent Arthur seemed to hope for a reaction. And Merlin wanted nothing more than to show him how much he had longed for this. To open his mouth and let Arthur’s touch rob him of every coherent thought, until he would melt into his embrace, his mind wrapped in pure bliss. But he could still smell the sharp odour of wine on Arthur’s breath and Merlin refused to be the substitute for whatever the prince hadn’t received tonight. He didn’t want to take something from this man that he would later regret and deny.
Just when Arthur was about to draw away again, his eyes opening slightly, searching for Merlin’s gaze, the pressure of his lips almost lost, a thought occurred to him. What if it was not the wine that fueled Arthur’s desire? What if it was an enchantment? Made by the gods themselves?
Before he fully lost contact with the prince’s lips, Merlin finally wrangled his hands from Arthur’s loosening grip and slipped them into his neck to bring them back together. The movement was so sudden that Merlin almost lost his balance, his chest knocking into Arthur’s, who automatically brought his hands up to Merlin’s sides to steady him. He could feel that Arthur was slightly confused, but when those hands didn’t fall away and Arthur’s mouth opened to Merlin’s prying tongue, he let his needs freely wash over him, unwilling to let go now that he was gifted the only thing he had never dared to speak of.
Arthur’s mouth was hot. Warm, wet breath laced with alcohol greeted Merlin when his tongue pushed inside to taste and feel. It should have been disgusting, but Merlin could only shiver as Arthur’s tongue slid against his. Simultaneously, the prince’s hands had wandered under his jacket to reach the hem of his tunic. Those fingers dancing lightly over the sensitive skin on his hips shot a jolt through Merlin’s spine, each and every one of his hairs standing up. His hips pushed forward, grinding into Arthur’s almost on instinct and when he felt the very prominent outline of an erect cock in the woolen trousers, Merlin couldn’t suppress a pleased moan any longer. The grinding was returned while their breathless kiss commenced until Arthur’s hands left Merlin’s hips to grab him by the collar and break their connection. Merlin scrambled slightly and whimpered a little, to his own embarrassment, because he didn’t want to let go.
“Merlin”, Arthur said sternly to catch his attention.
When Merlin looked at him his gaze was intense, his light blue eyes almost piercing Merlin’s.
“You’re wearing far too much clothing.”
Merlin blinked, his mind, addled by desire, needing far too long to catch onto Arthur’s meaning. When he did, a wide, goofy smile appeared on his lips.
“You too, My Lord”, he replied teasingly.
“Then let’s stop wasting time.”
The words fell almost like a growl from Arthur’s mouth. Before he could react, Merlin’s jacket was grabbed and pushed over his shoulders impatiently until it fell off his arms. The breath caught in his lungs. He wanted to speak, to agree, but his tongue and lips wouldn’t cooperate, every thought he had somehow getting lost the moment Arthur’s fingers grabbed the hem of his tunic and lifted it with a swift and trained motion over his head. Despite the warmth goosebumps were forming on his skin, his heart hammering painfully now. Fear and excitement swirled into one emotion inside his chest. Fueled by the hunger to feel Arthur’s skin, Merlin divested him of his top just as quickly, finally finishing what he had been denied mere minutes ago.
When they were facing each other again, already breathing heavily without any actual bodily exertion having taken place, Merlin was only granted a short moment to appreciate Arthur’s toned torso and well muscled arms before the prince wound an arm around his waist, bringing their chests together. The sudden contact of heated skin sent a rush of blood into Merlin’s nether regions, a new peak of arousal making him forget any reservations he still might have had at this point. Pushing himself off the ground his long legs quickly circled Arthur’s waist, his bottom supported by Arthur’s hands. He could feel fingers pressing into the soft rounds of his arse, kneading it like dough. It had Merlin moan in unabashed arousal, the sound stifled by Arthur’s mouth, which had trapped his own in another passionate kiss.
They were moving now. Arthur walking carefully around the table while still carrying him. Only a few steps and Merlin felt Arthur bent forward until his back hit the velvet sheets covering the royal bed. He could feel his heart skipping a beat when the thought began to settle in his mind. They were in Arthur’s bed, the prince on top of him, kissing him, grinding into him. It seemed like Arthur wanted to eat him up and swallow him whole, both of them panting in between kisses since there was never enough time to breathe. Merlin’s head was spinning from the deprivation of air as well as blood. But he didn’t mind at all. Never would he mind going mad like this.
Somehow Arthur was able to untangle himself from Merlin’s limps, which were holding him tight like an octopus refusing to release its prey. But at some point he understood that the space was needed in order to get rid of the remaining clothes which still stood between him and what he desired. When Arthur ripped his boots off the intensity of his gaze pinned Merlin into place. Unable to coordinate his digits he let his prince undo the lacing on his trousers and tug them down the long stretch of his legs until they were finally on the floor, immediately forgotten. Arthur’s garments were gone just as quickly. And as he stood there, golden, regal and strong in the fire light, Merlin was dumbstruck by the view. There was an aggression in Arthur’s piercing eyes, an overwhelming sense of hunger growing while they were roaming Merlin’s naked body, as if the last bit of sanity was leaving him as well.
The view fully convinced Merlin that his wish had been granted. Only an enchantment woven by the gods themselves could be potent enough to invade the strong willed and clear headed Prince of Camelot to the point where he would forget everything only to indulge his lust. Another sting to Merlin’s heart, another thought weighing on his conscience, conflicting emotions battling the joy he felt about finally having Arthur’s love. He should feel bad for bewitching his prince. He should call upon his magic to put an end to this. He shouldn’t use anyone like this.
Unfortunately this train of thought found an abrupt ending when Arthur suddenly crawled in between his legs and swallowed his weeping cock to the root.
“By Albion!”, Merlin shouted while throwing his head back.
It almost hurt when he hit the pillows, but the sensation of Arthur’s hot mouth engulfing his sensitive flesh numbed him for anything else. Scrambling for leverage on the sheets Merlin’s back arched up, automatically pushing his hips towards Arthur’s face. The prince didn’t seem to appreciate being nearly gagged by his erection. Two hands grabbed Merlin hard, pressing him back into the mattress. He struggled but only achieved losing that heavenly mouth sucking his cock.
“Arthur, please!”
Merlin was finally able to detach his fingers from the red fabric covering Arthur’s bed. He wanted to grab his head, push it back down where it belonged. But his prince had other plans. Suddenly Arthur was above him, covering his body with his own, letting Merlin feel the heat radiating off his skin. His eyes were shimmering, the firelight dancing in them while a smug smile graced those pink lips.
“What Merlin? What do you want?”, he teased, moving his hips slowly now, rubbing their cocks together.
The sensation of the engorged flesh moving against his own, silky skin and slick precome easing the way, was completely overwhelming, leaving Merlin to moan and mewl, unable to form clear words. His hips rose once again from the sheets, increasing the friction gloriously. Even his golden prince was forced to close his eyes and let a rough moan escape his throat. The sound ripped Merlin from his aroused haze. This was Arthur above him, he realised. The man he had desired for so long was naked in his arms and he was about to pass out from some humping and rubbing. If this was his only night with Arthur he couldn’t let himself be satisfied by that. He wouldn’t waste his wish by only feeling and not tasting.
Wrapping his trembling hand around Arthur’s cock Merlin stroked him sensually, revelling in the feeling of this vulnerable part of Arthur in his palm. The prince’s control slipped visibly upon Merlin’s touch and the moment a deeper sound fell from his lips Merlin saw his chance to reverse their positions. Both arms wound tightly around Arthur’s torso he flipped their bodies on the mattress and suddenly Arthur found himself on his back, staring wide eyed at Merlin who was grinning triumphantly above him.
“Merlin, what’re you doing?”
“You didn’t think I was just gonna lie there, did you?”
Without giving the royal prat a chance to reply Merlin slipped down, littering Arthur’s toned chest and belly with kisses on his way. Though he felt like he could spent hours just exploring each and every crevice on this body, licking the salt from every stretch of skin, Merlin’s patience was wearing thin. He was a man on a mission and his mission waited between Arthur's legs in the form of a beautifully erect cock.
And how beautiful it was. Hard and hot and red between Merlin’s fingers, precome running down from the exposed tip that was glistening like a polished gem in the firelight. He felt his mouth water upon the view. The first lick felt incredible. New and unfamiliar was the taste of his prince on Merlin’s tongue, bitter and salty just as himself, but also different. Craving more he closed his lips around the tip to suck it deeper into his mouth, assaulting the weeping slit immediately with his tongue. Arthur shouted his name, his hips starting to tremble under Merlin’s head. Merlin could feel him struggle not to thrust up into the heat of his mouth and though he wanted to take his time with Arthur, he decided to have mercy on him for now. They still had the whole night.
Grabbing Arthur’s hips with both hands he pushed them forcefully onto the mattress and held them their while his mouth started its decent down Arthur’s prick. The hard flesh was difficult to swallow whole. Arthur’s prick was not especially long but wide, stretching Merlin’s lips well. But he enjoyed the feeling. Flattening his tongue against the underside of Arthur’s cock he sucked hungrily, coating it with copious amounts of saliva before he began to bob his head.
Arthur’s hands found their way into Merlin’s hair. He could hear sounds of pleasure being ripped from his throat, rough groans of uncontrollable arousal, surprisedly high notes of overwhelming lust. They caressed Merlin’s ears in the sweetest way possible, making his blood boil and rush towards his groin. His feast on Arthur’s cock became messier. He wanted more. More of these noises, more of this taste, more of Arthur’s flesh. Without being aware of it Merlin’s hips had started to grind into the sheets, driving his achingly hard erection down into the mattress. It felt too good to stop now. The prince’s struggles seemed to increase, trying to buck up uncontrollably and Merlin decided to let him. Loosening his grip on Arthur’s hips he let is head be held in place by his hands and relaxed his jaw, allowing for his face to be fucked in earnest. After the first few erratic attempts Arthur found a satisfying rhythm which lured Merlin back into a almost drunken haze in which only the cock in his mouth and the movement of his own hips existed.
Saliva and precome. Sweat and heat. Moans and whimpers. Pushing and pulling. Rubbing and stroking. This was all Merlin’s world had boiled down to and the whirlwind of sensations seemed to go on for an eternity, pulling him deeper and deeper inside, until he almost forgot that everything must end.
He was reminded of it when Arthur’s rhythm faltered while Merlin’s name echoed now continuously throughout the room. Fingers tugged roughly on his hair. It was painful but good. He could feel himself reaching the edge of his own climax. It wouldn’t need much now, only a little push.
When Arthur screamed his name towards the canopy and his come spread bitter and searing on Merlin’s tongue his orgasm hit him with force of a battering ram. Arthur’s cock slipped from his mouth and he came up for air like a drowning man. Panting harshly he rode out the waves of pleasure while he felt the prince’s body still writhe beneath him. And then Arthur was there, his presence overwhelmingly strong, cradling Merlin’s face and kissing his taste off Merlin’s lips.
“You are amazing”, Arthur whispered in between kisses. “Simply mad.”
Merlin, devoid of words, could only smile like a lunatic.
“What are you doing?”
Merlin froze in the middle of the room. The position was awkward, his foot barely touching the ground, creating some difficulty for him to not fall on his arse. A prickling in his neck told him that Arthur was watching him.
“Merlin, I’m talking to you. Have you gone deaf?”
Arthur’s voice sounded rough and sleep addled. The syllables seemed to stick to the roof of his mouth, his tongue not cooperating in releasing them properly. Apart from his lust driven moans this sleepy morning voice was probably the most wonderful sound Arthur’s mouth had ever created in Merlin’s presence. And how much he would give to not have heard it. To have Arthur not awake but in deep slumber so he could slip out of the room undiscovered and pretend much more easily that the events of last night had never taken place.
It had not been his intention to still be in the royal chambers at dawn. He had planned to leave as soon as Arthur had fallen asleep. But the gods were cruel in their ways of fulfilling his wish apparently and had bestowed the prince with seemingly insatiable lust and unbreakable stamina. After their third round he must have passed out right on top of Arthur, because that is where he woke up not even half an hour ago. With the feeling of warm skin under his cheek and Arthur’s beating heart beneath his hand the memories had come crashing back, setting his face aflame and bringing panic to his mind. Quiet like a mouse he had crawled from the bed to collect his clothes, already losing the wonderful warmth of Arthur’s embrace. But if he wanted to avoid uncomfortable questions he needed to get out and so, boots in hand, he had been on his way to the door when the question reached his ears.
Merlin was completely aware how suspicious he must look, but since Arthur had no idea what they did last night, it would be easy to make up any excuse. He could just go back to playing the idiot and Arthur would buy it in a heartbeat.
Turning around gracelessly, he painted an apologetic smile on his face.
“I’m truly sorry that I disturbed your slumber, Sire. It was not my intention. See, I even took my boots off to be more quiet.”
He gesticulated to the shoes dangling from his left hand.
“And what is it, that you wanted to do so quietly?” Arthur asked.
The prince was lying on his side, his body bare from the waist up, his head propped up on one hand. Even after such a night he was still annoyingly handsome. It took all of Merlin’s willpower to drag his eyes away from the exposed skin. He shrugged as nonchalantly as possible while his mind was racing to find a good excuse for coming into the prince’s chambers only to sneak out again.
“I just...uhm...wanted to see if you were already up…”
“Oh really?”
“Yes, then I would’ve gotten breakfast and maybe Gaius’ hangover remedy…”
Even while he was saying it Merlin was aware how unconvincing he must sound. Arthur appeared to be of the same opinion since one of his eyebrows had risen in a sceptical manner.
“Hangover remedy….I see...and you’re sure that you didn’t try to sneak away like a thief because you want to avoid me?”
Merlin blinked.
“What? Why would I want to avoid you?”
He could feel his breath speeding up. Arthur could not know. He had been very clear with his wish. But maybe there was something Arthur thought he ought to be angry about, like Merlin’s disappearance from the feast. It would make sense.
“Look, Arthur, I’m sorry that I walked away from the feast last night and left you to the mercy of those two ladies. I just needed some fresh air and I didn’t think you would notice-”
“What by the gods are you rambling about? I don’t care that you ran from the feast. I want to know why you’re trying to sneak out of my chambers like you committed a crime. Are you so horrified by what we did last night?”
Arthur sat up and turned to Merlin. His legs dangled over the side of the bed while the middle of his body was thankfully still covered by the blankets. The gods knew Merlin wouldn’t have been able to concentrate if this part of Arthur was revealed to him now. His newly rising panic was already taking a toll on his mind's capacities. Swallowing heavily, he struggled to keep a confused smile on his face.
“W-what do you mean ‘what we did last night’? We didn’t do anything”, he stammered slightly while his head reeled to find an explanation for whatever Arthur thought had happened. “But you were quite drunk, really, I can’t remember another time where you’ve been so deep into your cups. You must’ve had some very vivid dreams.”
The excuse was weak and Merlin knew it. But what else was he supposed to say? He needed to give Arthur a way out. If the enchantment had failed to wipe his memories completely, it was his duty to provide an escape for his prince.
“Dreams...I see…”
The words sounded almost sad.
Merlin heard Arthur’s bare feet touch the ground and the rustling of fabric being dragged over stone. In a desperate attempt to avoid Arthur’s gaze Merlin held his own eyes glued to the floor, his heart racing painfully behind his ribs. After a few second of silence Arthur’s toes appeared in his field of vision. The rest of the prince’s feet was covered by the bedsheets. Then a hand cupped his jaw delicately.
“So you say it was the wine making me imagine my manservant’s lips sucking me off like his life depended on it before he climbed on top of me to ride me until I screamed?”
Blood shot up his neck. Merlin could feel it rushing into his ears and cheeks, painting them a glowing pink, while Arthur recounted their love making in an almost dirty fashion. But it was the truth. They had fucked and Merlin had feasted on Arthur body like a starving man and presented himself like a willing whore. He had taken full advantage of the situation. And now he had to realise that the man he loved and had sworn to protect remembered every last bit of his abominable behaviour.
“I’m sorry. This was not supposed to happen… I...I didn’t even believe it would work…”
Tears prickled in his eyes, but Merlin refused to let them fall.
“You weren’t supposed to remember”, he whispered, but of course it was no excuse.
“What do you mean ‘not supposed to remember’?” Arthur replied with a hint of annoyance and agitation.
“My wish. My Yule-wish. It was stupid, I didn’t believe in it. Why should the gods grant a wish upon a star? But they did and now they're punishing me for my selfishness.”
Finally finding the resolve to look up he was greeted with an expression of pure confusion on Arthur’s face. There was no anger yet, but it would emerge as soon as Merlin confessed the whole extent of his crime. The first tears spilled from his eyes and the boots dropped from his hand.
“I’m so sorry, Arthur. I’ve wanted you for so long but I knew it could never be. So I waited for a shooting star and wished for your desire to fall on me for one night. I only wanted one night to treasure forever while you would forget and go on with your life and build your kingdom and find your...queen.”
Arthur’s hand drew away from his face. He took a step backwards only to stare at Merlin with round eyes of disbelief. Though Merlin knew he didn’t deserve Arthur’s touch its loss still stung.
“Only to make sure I’m getting this right; you left the feast to wait for a shooting star to wish for me to get enchanted so I would fuck your brains out and then you wanted me to forget about it so I’d have no trouble with finding my comely wife and you could wank to the memories of this night all by yourself?”
The dry note in which the question was delivered pulled Merlin partially from his misery and had him take a closer look at Arthur face. Until now he had expected to see anger and confusion, maybe even pain and building rage. But the way Arthur phrased his abominable deed was too casual. There was a strange twinkling in his eyes which betrayed the tightness of his jaw.
“Y-yes?”, Merlin stammered, unable to think straight.
There was definitely annoyance in Arthur’s features. His light blue eyes rolled upwards, while his chest heaved with an exasperated sigh.
“Typical. Instead of keeping it simple and just leaving the feast with me to let me ravish you in my chambers after I’ve given you numerous hints throughout the year as to how much I wanted to do just that, you rather freeze your little bottom off for something that makes you even more miserable. Why am I not surprised?”
The breath caught in his throat when Arthur’s words hit him like a hauberk. What he heard made no sense. His prince had wanted him for a year and he hadn’t recognised it? Was he truly that thick to not see Arthur’s desires? Did that mean…
“You’ve...you’ve wanted me all along?”, he croaked.
Arthur smirked, amusement spreading over his face.
“Yes, Merlin. Nice of you to notice.”
Completely dumbfounded, Merlin could only stare while Arthur stepped closer again and slipped a hand into his neck to draw him in. The kiss was salty at first, but when it became deeper the last of Merlin’s tears were washed away and he could finally taste the sweetness of Arthur’s mouth and this time no bad conscience was embittering the experience. His arms snaked around broad shoulders and his fingers dug greedily into warm skin. Arthur’s hands found their way to the small of Merlin’s back and he felt himself being pressed against his body. The loss of the bedsheet did not bother his prince, apparently.
“So my wish was never granted”, Merlin mumbled against Arthur’s cheek when they finally broke the kiss to gain some air.
“Would you rather it was?”
Bringing a little space between them Merlin looked into Arthur’s earnest face. He seemed worried.
“No. I prefer being a thick idiot who didn’t see the signs.”
Relief seeped into the prince’s features. They both started to grin.
“That’s good then. But really, Merlin, wishing upon a star….what are you? Five?”
Merlin’s grin turned to a snort and then, when he finally realised the ridiculousness of his antics, into wheezing laughter. Arthur’s voice joined in without hesitation, echoing with amusement and joy in Merlin’s ears.
Destiny could go fuck somebody else for a change, Merlin thought. Arthur was doing a much better job, anyway.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}